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23 Jan
Except it just doesn’t work that way.
Part of life is death, the inevitable, no one has made it out alive. Humans believe there are certain orders of dying…. grandma, mom, kids – in age order, grand kids and so on and so forth.
Except it just doesn’t work that way.
My brother Paul died when I was 12. 45 years ago. When I was at the cabin last year I found a box – Paul’s belongings. Medals from the Marines, certificates of achievement, a few small trinkets and pictures. It was emotional to find that box, I enjoyed looking through it and thinking of my brother. Melancholy would be the right word mixed in with a small twinge of sadness for a life not yet completely lived, he was 19.
My sister, Arleen, died on December 1, 2013. Her husband, Aldo, died November 13, 2013.
Yesterday, I picked up my sister Janet at PDX and we drove to Arleen and Aldo’s house. We were meeting with an estate sales company and hoping to get out of there. Except it just doesn’t work that way. We still had to go through the house, do an inventory, ship their daughter’s room to her new home. It was physically and emotionally exhausting. Going through two lives not completely lived, and another life, forever changed.
I dropped off Janet at the airport around 4:00 for her flight home. I drove straight back to the coast, well, almost straight back, I did stop at Dairy Queen and got a medium chocolate shake with whipped cream. The minute I got home, I got into bed and slept 4 hours.
This has been one of the most moving experiences of my life, a roller coaster of emotions, a walk through a life you did not live, you expect it to be a list of tasks, except it just doesn’t work that way.
Cathy
1 Jan
Living the life you choose
It is amazing how many people live day to day, unhappy, unfulfilled, wishing their life was different. As we once again enter a new year it is time for renewal, to take the steps to make the changes to live a life fulfilled.
It took a nasty divorce, losing everything, a year of wandering to find my perfect life. 2013 ended totally screwed, I lost my beloved brother-in-law and sister within 3 short weeks of each other. Still, I live a life of my own choosing, volunteering as an Oregon Park Host and working as a Direct Support Professional for developmentally disabled folks. I changed my life from the pursuit of the almighty dollar to pursuit of making other peoples lives better. And I am fulfilled.
My heart, although broken with the losses, is still full. I know time will heal. I drove to Ecola State Park on Christmas Day – a place that fills my soul, stood at the edge of the cliff and gave thanks to the universe for my joy.
In this age of television, telling us what we need, blaring at us what we should look like, demanding that we spend our dollars to stave off aging, it is understandable why so many people feel less than their true worth.
I have been so greatly blessed to enjoy a body that works, a quick mind, a roof, a bed, food….. things that so many on earth do not have…. I am going to start the new year giving thanks for what I have, changing the things that suck and enjoying each day…… Happy New Year!
Cathy
16 May
Ecola State Park
I am getting really excited, it is almost June – I will be moving to Ecola. My heart absolutely sings every single day at Ecola. I wake up to find this big fellow in my backyard, the Pacific in the background crashing on the rocks.
I set up a bird scope on the main deck and show visitors the thousands of Common Murres on the big rocks, watching their faces as the birds come into focus, and for the first time they see colonies of seabirds nesting.
We walk the road from Ecola Point to Indian Beach, a 3 mile aerobic exercise through old growth forest ending at one of the most beautiful beaches in Oregon. Tide pools filled with starfish and mussels and a beach with razor clams waiting to be dug for dinner. Edgar just loves the beach and is free to run and sniff, Oregon allows dogs on their beaches, unleashed, under voice control. Sometimes we find the beach unoccupied, ours alone to explore…. nirvana.
This year I am planning on taking photos of the big bull Roosevelt Elk that comes into my yard and document his growing antlers in pictures. It is my hope to catch some photos of the calfs as they grow through the summer, the mom elk cows keep them well hidden most of the time.
I am also within walking distance, 3 mile round trip, to Cannon Beach and Pizza a fetta. They sell some of the best pizza on earth, by the slice, a favorite destination. The ice cream shop across the street is a temptation but 3 miles = 1 slice of pizza or 1 ice cream – not both 😦
I just love living on wheels. I can’t imagine being cemented again to a foundation. I also love being an Oregon Park Host, living a life of giving as a volunteer, making the experience of Oregon State Parks the best ever for each and every visitor.
You do indeed reap what you sow… sow happiness and joy and it comes back in multitudes. It is a gorgeous day here, me and Edgar are heading for the bike path for a walk through the shore pines to Nehalem Bay.
Cathy
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2 May
The Complaint Book
As I sat here this morning in my RV watching the hummingbirds six inches out my window, the sun shining, Edgar sleeping, I thought about my “old life”.
I kept a journal called the “Complaint Book”. The two things I did every morning were check my sales numbers from the day before and deal with Customer Complaints. I kept it separate from all my other paperwork and never carried it into a customer’s office, any meeting, it was a handwritten, stand alone, one of a kind living journal for my eyes only.
I believe complaints are the most important factor to happiness for yourself and a happy customer. You know a complaint… any sentence that starts with “This sucks” or your version thereof. Complaints are sacred in sales and life, writing them down gives you a good indicator of how your life, or sales, are going.
Along with customer complaints, I would write down my own daily complaints. When I found myself complaining enough about one certain thing – it was time for a change. If there were enough complaints to fill a book, you really got to look at your life…..
Customer complaints were usually easy to rectify. Some took a good explanation of the realities of supply and demand especially when a customer wanted a small supply of a paper that needed to be ordered by the big expensive case 🙂 I used to order in sample sheets for customers if they needed to do an order of business cards on a specialty sheet – I still hate business cards from a printers and paper suppliers point of view.
So this morning I thought about cleaning out my locker and finding the “Complaint Book” among my stored belongings. I left it at home when I started my journey, it was shredded, along with my other paperwork from xpedx and Clean Copy when the locker was emptied and I moved my entire life into the RV.
I no longer need a “Complaint Book”, I transformed my life into one where each day alive is certainly a good day on earth. Time to wake up Edgar, we are walking to Manzanita – about a 4 mile round trip, to drop off some mail at the post office and grab a nice coffee.
Cathy
